To: New York DeMolay
Fr: “Dad” Brusoe
Date: July 22, 2022
Subject: Updated Youth Protection Policies
DeMolay International recently adopted updated youth protection policies which you will find attached, or linked here and squires here (if you are reading this on the web). I am asking every advisory council to disseminate them to your entire advisory council and to also share them with the parents/guardians of your members. Ask if there are questions. I am always happy to answer any questions you may have.
As advisors, we have an obligation not just to prevent the bad from happening, but to also create a supportive environment where all can thrive. We do this by our Brotherhood Contract (also attached or here) and our code of conduct for adult volunteers (attached or here). As adult leaders of our youth groups we need to make sure we are creating the best environment for our youth to thrive. At your next meeting, please take the time to review these documents with your advisory council and your members.
In reviewing the youth protection standards there are some areas that I want to clarify or make sure we are onboard with New York’s laws and policies.
1. Throughout the document there is a reference to an “advisor” and a “volunteer” for New York, these terms are synonymous for our purposes. Every advisor or volunteer must be registered through e-scribe, has taken training, and has gone through a background check. In counting advisors or having coverage for the ratios or two deep leadership it is NOT sufficient to be a parent, Senior DeMolay or Master Mason, or to be an advisor for another youth group. You need to be registered with DeMolay.
2. Page 3, Point #4: Parental notification: I understand text messaging is popular. Please continue to use that if it is working for you. When it comes to listing events or activities I am requesting that it be sent in an email as well to all parents, advisors and your respective governor. When I receive a complaint that a parent was not informed about a DeMolay activity the answer “Well there was a text message” is not sufficient. Reminders can just be via text.
3. Social Media (page 3): This language: “Any photos provided by individuals other than the jurisdiction’s designated official photographer(s) should require approval prior to posting on official DeMolay social media accounts.” If you are going to take a picture that will be posted on your chapter or sent to NY DeMolay, please notify the participants and give them the option to not be in the photo. Something like “Friends, this will be going up on Instagram or Facebook, if you’re not comfortable with that please step out of the photo.” We also know that young people may not want to have their photo taken. If a person says “I don’t want to be in the photo.” The conversation stops there. Do not cajole, respect their decision. See also page 6 for more on this.
4. Social Media (Page 3): All moderators and administrators for DeMolay social media MUST be current registered adult volunteers. We know in some cases there have been long term advisors who may have let their registration lapse. If you have a non-advisor as a moderator in the group, they must be registered or begin the registration process by 7/30/2022.
5. Social Media (Page 3): It is critically important that you admit only people that are known to you or are otherwise verifiable by you as being members of DeMolay International, the parent of an Active DeMolay or young woman involved in our program. IF you deny a person please make a note of it to avoid us having to go back and forth with dealing with a complaint.
5. Page 4, Hazing and bullying of youth: New York State has some of the strictest anti-bullying laws in the nation. For a full summary please see: https://www.stopbullying.gov/resources/laws/new-york . The biggest piece of advice I can offer on this is this: Before speaking, writing, or doing, ask yourself is this kind? There’s a beautiful piece of ritual that admonishes us to think twice, before speaking once.
6. Page 4, Energy Drinks: DeMolay International strongly discourages energy drinks. These are products like Red Bull or Monster. No DeMolay unit or person involved in our organization should be giving young men these beverages. Some jurisdictions have gone to an absolute ban on them. New York is not doing that. Our goal is to make sure our young men are making good, healthy choices. The times I have seen young men using these high energy drinks it’s usually “Man I am so tired, I need this to stay awake.” This would be a good time to talk about making sure they’re on a regular sleep schedule and time management. If we find energy drinks are a problem we may revisit this policy.
7. Page 8: Annual training for DeMolay Programs: This training may take place at the state or local level. It is my policy that each chapter should provide a youth protection training once every six months. This may be accomplished by watching parts of the youth protection DVD, or by coming up with another program. This is a great opportunity to bring in a speaker like a police officer, state trooper, or sheriff, or a community resource officer. I am asking that if you have a proposed program that you let me now what you are planning ahead of time so we can make sure it fits the intention of this requirement. We will be offering a youth protection program at our state events but this does not abrogate the local level requirement.
8. Page 8, Annual training for Squires Programs: this training is clearly specified and we need to show “It Happened to Me.” If you have advisors and youth who are involved in the chapter and the manor they will need to see both.
9. Page 11: Medications: There is a lot in the medication policies. If your chapter is doing overnight activities please review this thoroughly. New York DeMolay moved ahead with this policy for our overnight events in the Fall of 2019 to move us into compliance with New York State law.
10. Not new policy, but I would remind the advisory councils that they have the right to prohibit or remove an objectionable person from DeMolay functions. They must notify the Executive Officer when they do this.
11. From time to time, I have questions about how our interactions with Rainbow and Triangle work. Our policies are in place when we travel to visit our sisters in Rainbow and Triangle. If your chapter is visiting an area reception or a district convention, we must still follow our rules of two deep advising etc. We are also guests in “their house.” If, for example one of our allied groups has a rule that there are no cellphones during lunch we should follow that.
Thank you for all you do each and every day!